Legal Law

Gray Divorce – Let Go and Start Over!

Women seeking divorce in higher numbers

Are you one of those people who have been in a long-term marriage and have now decided to divorce? Perhaps you married at a young age and found that as you matured and developed, you and your partner drifted apart. Or you recognize that something vital is missing between you and your partner. Well, it’s never too late to change your mind. Startling statistics provided by the US Human Resources Services Administration show that Americans age 55 and older are getting divorced in greater numbers than ever before. In fact, census figures show that divorce among people age 65 and older has doubled since 1980. And a recent national study by the American Association of Retired Persons suggests that older married women among ages 40 and 80 seek divorce in greater numbers than men.

A desire for freedom, identity and fulfillment

So what is behind this new phenomenon known as gray divorce and why are so many men and women succumbing to divorce after decades of marriage? The reasons vary between men and women, but according to some studies, women say they have finally reached a breaking point and are no longer willing to live with or deal with certain behaviors. Whether it is due to having suffered addiction to alcohol or drugs, physical or emotional abuse, infidelity or simply because they do not feel fulfilled, many women are leaving relationships that generate dissatisfaction. And while we often hear of men leaving partners for younger women, many men who opt for divorce at a later age say they are bored and dissatisfied. Most older men who are leaving long-term partners are interested in finding ways to experience life more, and in fact, most of them say they want the chance to meet someone who can make life more meaningful. life.

The common thread of gray divorce

A common thread that seems to run through all those men and women who are going to divorce at a later date is a desire for freedom, to find their identity and a need for greater fulfillment. Once a person stops denying the reality of their situation and acknowledges that their longevity marriage is simply not working, many choose to leave. However, while it is very exciting for some when they think about going their own way, it is still very scary to consider. However, despite the fear of starting over, and the guilt and consequences that may follow, most who decide to divorce feel strongly that it is the right decision. Even for those who seem to have it all, including financial security, a career, and a successful relationship, the idea of ​​divorce becomes more and more attractive. Realizing that regardless of societal opinion on the issue, or how their children feel about it, older couples are willing to take the risk of creating the life they want rather than continue living the life they have.

Advice and support for those considering a gray divorce

The ultimate driving force in old age divorce is simply that people want something different. And while divorce was once considered a stigma, that stigma is slowly fading. People are tired of trying to solve relationship problems that never seem to get resolved and tired of feeling dissatisfied. Consequently, for those who do take the plunge, the most important thing to consider is whether or not they are prepared to take on the world on their own. Having spoken to a number of people who are going through the challenges of divorce, especially in recent years, it is highly recommended that men and women try not to go it alone, but instead consider therapy, a support group, or at the very least, a good friend who can be supportive through the divorce trials. A good support system can make the process much easier. But, once seniors have decided that their marriage bond is no longer viable, even if it is difficult, they are willing to do whatever it takes to move on to something new. Simply put, gray divorce among the elderly is becoming a part of the American way of life.