What is a bully?

A Bully is someone who teases, hits, pushes, or threatens another. If, for example, you are with your friends and you start making fun of someone in the group, you are being a stalker. You might be thinking, “Peking duck, it’s all fun!” True, but are you having fun at the expense of someone else’s feelings? Any teasing or hateful words can lead to lasting painful memories.

When I was a cute duckling, there was a big brown duckling that was bigger than me but not quite grown. He would swim in our pond showing off and being mean to all the other ducklings. Even though he was mean to them most of the time, the little ducklings still followed him like he was a great leader. For some reason, they thought it was sweet to hang out with an older duckling.

One day the other ducklings and I were playing tag and the big brown duck was swimming near us laughing and calling to me. He made fun of my glasses, my hat and my Chinese accent. Soon the other ducks stopped playing with me and started teasing me too. Even my best friend Orlando Jim started chatting with everyone else.

The big brown duck swam towards me with all the other ducklings following. He looked me straight in the eye and said, “I don’t like the way you squawk!” then he turned to the other ducks and yelled, “The Peking duck squeals like a little pig when it quacks!” Then he opened his mouth wide and let out a great shriek. He told all the other ducks to screech and they did. Soon they were all swimming in a circle around me, screeching and laughing. He was embarrassed and hurt. Tears ran down my beak. I submerged my whole body under the water to escape. I swam home as fast as I could. Most of the way home they followed me squealing and laughing. When I got home, I wiped the tears from my eyes. My mother asked me what was wrong, but I never told her. I kept it to myself.

The next day my best friend Orlando Jim came over to play. He couldn’t understand why he was so upset. I asked him why he had to make fun of me. Why didn’t he tell the other ducks how bad it was to pick on another? He tilted his head and whispered, “We were joking around.” I asked him how he would feel if I made fun of him. He replied, “he would make me mad at you.” “And that’s how I feel right now,” I explained “MAD!”

The point is that if you joke around and make fun of another person, you will hurt their feelings and make them angry. If you’re out with your friends and one person is harassing another, don’t support the harasser; Support the person who is being bullied. Be a wise squawk and say, “Hey, cut it out!” Or better yet, find an adult to help you end a very bad situation.

Remember, if you join teasing and hurtful words, you also become a bully.

How to know if a student is being bullied

If you notice a change in behavior, you may want to talk to the child to see if there are any problems. For example, if a child is normally outgoing and willing to participate one day and then suddenly becomes quiet and is afraid to raise their hand. However, a quiet child becomes loud and obnoxious. If this happens, you may want to talk to the child to see if someone is bullying them. Unfortunately, when you ask a student if there is a problem, they may not give you a truthful answer, so it is very important that you recognize the warning signs.

Here is a list of warning signs:

By keeping a watchful eye, you can help prevent serious emotional and physical damage.

How do you spot a stalker?

Unlike movies and TV shows that dress assailants in leather jackets, oiled hair, and tattoos with a mean look on their faces, many real-life assailants do not resemble any of these characters. The truth is that a bully can be tall, big, short, smart, average, muscular, skinny, not so smart, not so muscular, small, young, old. The one thing all bullies have in common is that they like to be the boss or the leader. You can tell they are bullies when they try to drain the self-esteem of others in order to look and feel better.

Here is a list of things to look for in your classroom, in the hallway, on the playground, or at home:

If a child pushes another child

If a child makes fun of another child’s appearance

If a child is always talking negatively about another student or students

If there are conversations between children that leave one or more out of the group

If you see students on the playground gathering in a circle

If a student reacts violently toward you or another student

If you see that students seem to be intimidated by another student

If you see a repeated and consistent negative action towards another student

There is an imbalance of power between an alleged harasser and the targeted student.

Remember that all students, staff, and parents have the power to end a conflict situation before it becomes a negative physical or emotional situation.